OMG, HOLY MOLY, and other EXPLICATIVES!!

On May 13, 2009, I wrote about Amarillo, Texas, specifically stating I did not anticipate ever moving back.

Guess what. Saturday, May 23, 2009 (a sad and pathetic TEN days later), the decision was made by the Tortoreo Clan - Coconut Creek Division - to move back to Amarillo.

Hmmm. What, you may ask, inspired this shrewd and calculated move?
1. Winters are lovely in Amarillo, a stark comparison to the drab, breezy, 70-something days of Fort Lauderdale.
2. The beauty and spectacle of the elusive and rare Tornado is something not to be missed, and quite harmless in nature, contrary to popular belief (and those darned misleading news reports).
3. Really, how many palm trees does one person need to see in his or her lifetime?
4. There's too much money in South Florida. The spectacle of BMWs, Mercedes, Ferraris, (and on and on) is just the sad attempt of people with money to find happiness in material things, when truly they should be looking for the inner beauty in themselves, and in those people driving 20-year-old, beat up Toyotas and the occasional Fiat.
5. When the polar ice caps melt because of global warming, all of our sun-loving friends will be dead, buried beneath the flooded low-lands of this everglades state. The Tortoreo's will be safe, warm (or cold in winter, depending on when this occurs), and dry.

Oh, Amarillo. Where else could you possibly want to live!